Cheating can simply be define as an act of deception, fraud, trickery, imposture, imposition or infidelity.
In relationship or marriage it’s similar but not the same.
Cheating is when you are unfaithful to your partner/husband; It’s as simple as that, and it is the greatest challenge of most relationships nowadays. Many people have walked away from their relationships/marriages because their partners cheated on them.
It can be difficult for someone who is not cheating in a relationship to forgive someone who cheated on him/her at times Cheating deals with our emotions, its touches us differently so we react towards it differently.
Some find it very difficult to erase it from their minds because they are faithful to their partners and to their words too, they trust and rely on whom they have chosen to love..
Sometime it might be a lifetime pain for who doesn’t cheat at all.
What are the causes of cheating in relationship/marriage?
- when one of them is not contented with what they have.
- Insecurity.
- Abuse and harassment.
- Lack of good communication and little attention.
- Disrespect.
- Infidelity.
- Distance.
- Comparison.
- When one of them is too overambitious and pompous.
- Lack of self discipline and self control.
- Too much of intimacy to people you are not intending to date or you don’t want to go into relationship with.
- In ability to avoid/stay away from your ex’s.
- Fear and confusion.
- When one of them is a se× addict.
- It’s many but let me stop with these few.
Is cheating a mistake?
Cheating is not done by mistake, it’s a deliberate act.
You can always avoid cheating if you want to.
I wonder when people say’s after cheating that it was done by mistake. Cheating is not a mistake and it can never be a mistake, it’s always deliberate action and it’s intentional to do it… you know it when you are about cheating on your partner, walking towards the wrong path or doing things that can lead you to cheating on your partner, so you can always avoid doing it if you want to.
How can you avoid cheating?
1. Don’t keep close friend with your ex’s they are not your best friends anymore and they are not also your enemies, just avoid them to avert unnecessary fall back to your past.
2. Avoid intimacy with opposite se× mostly those you are not in a relationship with, act decent and comport yourself whenever you are with people you are not dating, no foul plays.
3. Distance yourself from who you don’t wish to date and don’t turn all your toasters or ex’s to your close friends (your bestle) that is where cheating usually start from.
4. Let people you can not date know that you can not date them and keep a good distance away from them, don’t give them fake promises, attention or impression by converting them to your common friends.
5. Dress good when you are with opposite se×, they can force you to have se×.
6. You will always admire some people even when you are in serious relationship, avoid such people they can cause you to cheat on your partner.
7. Stop giving too much attention to people you are not dating, that can lead you to be avoiding or abandon your own relationship. You may start falling in a cheap love when you give too much attention.
8. Make your partner your best friend and adviser, don’t choose others over him/her, it’s wrong. Your partner should be your first priority.
9. Don’t dress to impress others, dress to impress your partner not others, your first priority should be your spouse/husband.
There are lots of ways you can cheat and you may not even plan that you want to cheat on your partner, Initially your plan may be just to catch cruise with others until you find’s yourself doing more than that, well its might be because you have a very good attitude or genuine character towards others. It’s good to have a good heart but have limits, set boundaries for yourself in the ways you give people attention and the way you treat others so that you won’t find yourself becoming a victim of such circumstance because so many people have cheated on their partners by so doing, they don’t plan it at first but it’s because they didn’t know when they are stepping beyond their boundaries, they mistakenly ran into cheating gradually through things they do with others..
Can we forgive cheating?
Don’t be surprised when I say you can forgive cheating but it is difficult to forget cheating.
I want you to know that everyone in this life deserve’s a second chance after doing some silly mistakes or silly things so for this reason, at some points you can try to forgive someone that cheated on you. Give people that second chance because no one is perfect.
Cheating has levels anyways, and you can also say cheating is cheating even if it’s just cheating with common kiss you can say its has no difference but to me its has levels, grades, and categories. For example: Someone who is planning getting married to two guys at a time because of their money, if the two guys are faithfully to her, dating her alone and they are also ready to marry her but she is busy deceiving them collecting their money. If they get to know such a evil plan, such a person I won’t advise them to forgive her, someone like that is a very dubious person and doesn’t deserve to be a wife at home so heartless and doesn’t deserve a second chance at all.
Example two: Some ladies can cheat because they are not sure that you really want to marry them. Someone who cheated on you not because she is not getting enough money or attention from you but because she don’t know the level of love you have for her or if you are not giving her any assurance of getting married to her someday or anytime soon, so In order for her not to lose or waste too much of her time, she tried to look for an alternative or double her chances elsewhere because she has been asking you your plans for her and you don’t say anything relevant, reasonable or tangible to her but she still loves you despite, if she decides to look for an alternative in case you mess up with her feelings she can still be forgiven because she did it because she didn’t know your plans for her but she loves you still, such a lady, if you wish you can forgive her genuinely, but a lady you have taken to your Mom and Dad (parent) given her all the assurance of getting married to her someday but because of money and luxuries or if she is not contented with the little things that you have and things you have been giving her, if she goes out to cheat on you because of that, such a lady does not deserve forgiveness or second chance.
Some Ladies can cheat because they are not sure or if they are doubting your love for them and if they feel you don’t really wanted to marry them and if they don’t know the level and the percentage of love you have for them, if they don’t have the assurance of you getting married to them anytime soon, such cheating Is forgivable if you still love her and if you are capable of letting go of her past.
Forgiving cheating is based on our maturity and understanding, and how sorry the one who cheated was at that moment or point in time you caught him/her cheating on you. Someone who just say sorry one’s and he/she is believing you will forgive overnight without reacting at all to it again, he/she just want you to accept it just like that and continue with the relationship immediately without saying a word, he/she didn’t even feel worried about it, concerned or feel sobered for what he/she has done to you, he/she just believed you have forgiven him/her like that in just a day and it’s gone… such a lady/guy didn’t deserve forgiveness at all but if he/she is always begging you day by day and sending everyone around, friends and family to beg on his/her behalf, showing how concern and worried he/she is for what he/she has done to you for at least sometimes, such a lady/guy deserves forgiveness if you feel that he/she is sobered and has regretted his/her actions and he/she is ready to change totally.
Maturity and understanding matter’s whenever we want to forgive someone who cheated on us.
If you know you are not mature enough or having full understanding on how to forgive cheating, don’t try it because it will always comes to your mind but if you are mature and you have the understanding you will overlook with time..
It’s difficult to forgive and forget anyways, but remember this: if you leave who is genuinely sorry because he/she cheated on you, are you sure who you will meet after such person will be a saint indeed? answer that question vividly and correctly within yourself before you make that decision to leave him/her .. the saint might look like a saint indeed but can have the worse past ever.
In conclusion: the only way to avoid chest is to be contended with whatever you have.