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Answers So Far..

  • Someone asked:
    Hi MLL&I Please I need you all to help buttress this for me and tell me what to do I got married barely 4 months, within that short period of time, I took a wrong step which was a very big mistake of my life. I have extra marital affair with an old friend, though married, after the deed, my wife get to know and at that point I know this was a bomb for me, I apologize with everything I could think of even with my life never to make such mistake again, she eventually forgive but never forget(I know it can be like that, a drop of feaces at the peak of a food plate, if it comot for face e no fit comot for mind) So ever since then, my wife never trusted me not having anything to do with the lady simply because we work I. Same place if work, and no how we would always have one or two thing to discuss base on work and work alone, I avoided her so much. But funniest thing is that, my wife has been using this against me always, she can suddenly bring up a sudden character like snobbing me and since I know she's always like that, I will try to call her attention asking her what the problem is, but all she say is "I'm fine" but today she totally change to me to the extent that since morning she never have any conversation with me,that I even have to make the meal for us to eat but she didn't Now she's threatening me to take her to hospital, that she's not feeling too well and if anything happens to her, it's on me. Also she's telling me, she would rather speak what's happening and what I did out to those that need to know should in case. Please what would you advice me to do Should I rather, explain myself to the member of my family that I'm scared of not I forming of my wrong step or let it slide cause I think they know through me that hearing from her mouth. Please Ladies(married and single)/ guys(married and single), enlighten me, what should I do
    • mylovelifeandi replied:
      Dear [Anonymous],The deed is already done, and even though you were the one who strayed, you will feel the same way she felt. It's more painful for someone who is not cheating to find out they've been cheated on. It takes time to forget, even if they forgive. Telling family about it may help matters, or it may make things worse. They might help you appeal to her to forgive you, but some might advise her to leave you for your mistake instead of trying to settle it.In this case, I would advise you to have a one-on-one conversation with a counselor to guide you both. I strongly believe it can be perfectly settled through that, and we can offer you that here if you want. Meeting a counselor is more preferable than involving family because you don't really know their experiences or what they have in mind for you. A counselor will only do their job without bias or trying to dismantle your family.I hope you understand.Best regards, [MY LOVE LIFE AND I]
  • Someone asked:
    In order not to make the story long… I caught my guy cheating on me though it was on his phone I saw ps( I collected his phone and went through it in his present) I saw he met with a girl twice and was asking for sex twice, the girl refused. We broke up and I later forgave him ,Now the problem is I can’t stop thinking about what I saw, it keeps coming to my mind and this is someone I’ve never cheated on
    • mylovelifeandi replied:
      Dear [Anonymous],The reason it's constantly paining you that he is cheating on you is because you are not the type that likes cheating in your relationship or someone who has been cheated on. Anytime you remember that, it's normal for it to hurt you. However, if you know you can't endure it, you shouldn't have gone through his messages. Now that you have seen it all, what is your decision? Is it to stay or to leave him?If you know you can't tolerate cheating, walk away from him so that you won't be hurting yourself or forcing yourself to continue staying in a relationship that you are no longer happy with. What you need to do now is confront him and ask for his side of the story. After hearing his explanation, if you still can't accept what he says, it's best to stay away from him to avoid constant pain.When a relationship no longer brings you happiness, there's no point in staying in it. Forgive if you can, because anyone can make a mistake, and no one is above making mistakes. Anyone who is ready to change and turn a new leaf deserves to be loved, no matter the level of their mistakes. I hope you understand everything I have said.Best regards, [MY LOVE LIFE AND I]
  • Someone asked:
    Hello everyone, I have a issue of being very shy, am a very shy person. The last relationship I had, he complained of me being shy, not free around him, that am too quiet and gentle which really affect me. Am always too shy to talk and relate with people. And it makes me scared of going into a new relationship because I feel like it might affect my relationship again and I don't even know how to go about it. And my stature also make me feels bad sometimes because am close to 25 but people see me as a 18 year old girl. And it makes me feel somehow because I have a small stature. What do u suggest I do?
    • mylovelifeandi replied:
      Dear [Anonymous],Low self-esteem seems to be the core issue you're experiencing, with shyness being a natural trait that has been compounded by this. It's important to seek counseling to build your confidence and overcome negative self-perceptions. If you feel comfortable, please consider reaching out to me directly so we can have a more personal conversation about this.You should always strive to be proud of who you are, regardless of your appearance. It's crucial not to let others' opinions affect you negatively. Seek a partner who loves you for who you are and understands that shyness is a natural trait, not a flaw.The person you previously dated seems to have exacerbated your issues based on your account. I suggest forming friendships before diving into relationships to ensure you find someone who genuinely understands and accepts you. Despite your past, it's essential to move forward and believe in your own beauty and worth.Feel free to DM me or call me at +2347030582692 for further support.Best regards,[MY LOVE LIFE AND I]
  • Someone asked:
    Good evening, there's this guy, he has been on my issue since last year, he want us to be in a relationship,I like him but I don't love him. have seen all his efforts and have tried my best to keep friendship with him maybe in the process i will fall in love with it, but i didn't. He claims him really love that he wants to marry me, he bought me gift on my birthday and on Valentine's day, he check on me all the time, even when am rude to him, he still apologized. Have Tried all my best to express to him that am not interested, I even told him because we are working in the same place that it won't work. But his not listening. I don't want to hurt him and I also don't know what to do anymore. And on the other hand am scared of losing him because I feel like will I be able to meet someone like him that will also treat me the same way he does? he treat me differently from the guys have come across. Should I give him a chance or I should just tell him am not interested and let him go.
    • mylovelifeandi replied:
      Dear [Anonymous],It is often observed that some women do not fully appreciate a man who treats them well until they are on the verge of losing him. This can also apply to men, who sometimes fail to value a woman who loves them, instead focusing on someone they have to work hard to win over.I'm glad you have realized that you do not want to lose him because he treats you well. Since you haven't fallen in love with him yet, I wouldn't advise forcing the relationship. Instead, give it more time. Stay close to him as friends, and with time, you might develop deeper feelings if it's meant to be. However, don't force yourself into a relationship out of pity. Wait patiently and let love grow naturally.The relationship has the potential to work if you give it time and practice. Avoid actions that might cause him to lose interest. Continue treating him well and give him your attention, even if you haven't committed to him yet. Let him feel your affection and support. Encourage the love to grow within you through your actions and behavior towards him.Best regards,[MY LOVE LIFE AND I]
  • Someone asked:
    Pls, is there any counselor that someone can speak to. Thank you in advance
    • mylovelifeandi replied:
      WhatsApp or call me on +2347030582692
  • Someone asked:
    Good afternoon, there's lady I have been with so closely for over 4 years now, anytime I talk about relationship with her she gets angry 😡 telling me relationship is the last thing on her mind but yet she does almost everything a girlfriend should do for her boyfriend to me. Recently,I stopped calling and not showing any commitments towards her but still I can't just get her off my mind.She do call to just on me from time to time and when discovered I don't call her again, she told me, I should not think of leaving her because it will not work. And I can't remain in friend zone for long time wait for no one. She won't let me into her heart but others around us believe we're dating because of the way we relate and she allowing me to talk to her parents on phone, I have waited for too long and I think I should back out so as to learn how to love another person because I have rejected many ladies because I feel more comfortable with her than any person though we fight a lot but we're best of friends. Is she using me to catch cruise or she wants me fix something before she says yes?
    • mylovelifeandi replied:
      Dear [anonymous],You have made efforts to maintain some distance from her, yet she has expressed her desire for you to stay by her side and not consider leaving her. It is important now to have a sincere conversation with her. Share your concerns about not being content with remaining in the friend zone indefinitely, as further delay may lead you to seek companionship elsewhere. It seems as though she may be inadvertently wasting your time, and it is crucial to express this to her. Give her the opportunity to reflect on these matters and make a decision, while also letting her know that you too will make a decision based on her response.Ask her why she presents herself as more than a common friend, giving you hints of a romantic relationship when she labels you as just a friend. Express your genuine worries and desire to understand the future of your connection. Let her know that you are unable to continue accepting her friendship without clarification. You may also inquire if she is involved with other individuals, as this could be a reason for her reluctance to pursue a relationship with you.Additionally, inquire about her consistent statements regarding not being ready for a relationship, continuously placing you in the friend zone and avoiding interactions with other women. If she cannot provide a valid explanation for her behavior, consider the possibility that she is purposefully wasting your time without cause. It is also plausible that she may have reservations about entering a new relationship due to past experiences or emotional pain.It is imperative to gather this information and assess whether her responses are convincing enough for you to continue the relationship. If her explanations do not satisfy your concerns, it may be best to consider letting her go, as there is no benefit in investing time in a situation that may not progress positively.Best regards, [MY LOVE LIFE AND I]
  • Someone asked:
    My girlfriend told me not to call her again in my entire life because l didn't send her 10k at the exact time she wants it. Notwithstanding l told her that my main phone was off and l can't do anything at that particular moment as l was in a crucial meeting where we were told not to answer calls but she kept calling, l now pleaded with a friend to help me send her the 10k.when he his about to send it l received her message that l should not call again in my entire life since l don't want to pick her calls but that didn't make me not to send the money l sent it. When l dismissed from the meeting. I called her she didn't pick up my calls so l now call her mum to inform her Daughter that l have sent the money.which she did.Since last week Monday till now she haven't called to atleast say thank you.When l saw that her message that l should not call her in my entire life since l don't want to pick her calls. I angrily told her to go to hell if that what she wants. Since then she haven't called me and l haven't called her. She didn't even consider the help l have been rendering all this while.Just because l didn't send money Immediately she want itWhat do you suggest. I think that's a red flag Should l lock up ?
    • mylovelifeandi replied:
      Dear [Anonymous],There is a saying in Yoruba culture that goes, "The hand that is set to cut your head mistakenly cuts your cap; should you not thank God for saving your life?"If you have been financially supporting someone for a significant period of time, and they react dramatically to a single instance where you are unable to do so, to the point of telling you never to contact them again, it may be excessive.A person who forgets all your past good deeds due to a minor mistake is likely more concerned about themselves than the relationship itself. This behavior may indicate a lack of genuine love.In this situation, the individual's response was so extreme that she couldn't even appreciate or offer an apology after realizing her error. Her lack of communication or effort to make amends suggests that her actions may not be rooted in true love.If I were to offer you advice, I would suggest giving her the space to reflect and learn from this experience. If she truly values the relationship and has a future with you, she will likely reach out to apologize. If she does not, it may be a sign that she is not the right partner for you.Even if you decide to reach out to her eventually, it may be beneficial to give her time and space. Remember, in a non-marital relationship, financial support should not be the primary focus, and understanding and mutual respect should be paramount.Best regards, [MY LOVE LIFE AND I]
  • Someone asked:
    Am very confused bcuz i never hide anything from him and have plain to him since yesterday have been thinking alot of things ... Maybe is bcuz of the visa is processing that his why he change towards me an since they decline his visa maybe that is why his begging me an send sweet words to me .....even when i needed his help he could not help .....am not after his help or money but i just want him to me straight forward with me .... please am so confused
    • mylovelifeandi replied:
      If you've already seen clear evidence, there's no need to prolong matters. Follow your heart; if it tells you to leave, do so. If it supports the relationship, continue, and may God help you. I've said my peace. Decide and stand by your decision for the benefit of your future. Best regards, [MY LOVE LIFE AND I].
  • Someone asked:
    Good evening everyone i met a guy on match making site and he said he want serious relationship and likewise me also.we start getting along planing our future together. He insisted i should move to his state so that we can know more about each other but due to my work I can't relocate bcuz i don't want to be a burden to any guy and we just met but all a sudden he change towards he doesn't call me like before or check on me.i asked him wat is going on and he said nothing and i asked him about his plans and he said his on it ...i saw his post yesterday that his sad an. I question him wat happen he said they decline his Visa.i was shocked bcuz he never mentions anything like that to me and I asked him wat if they accept his visa that's his how he travels without letting me know . since yesterday he said he was for how he treated me that we should continue our dating..... but my question is that should i continue with him or not bcuz of confused
    • mylovelifeandi replied:
      Dear [Anonymous],Firstly, meeting someone on a dating website warrants caution and vigilance since it's a virtual connection without prior physical interaction.It appears that he has suddenly changed, suggesting he may be distancing himself and feeling pressured in the relationship. His actions indicate a lack of commitment, evident when he attempted to leave the country without informing you. Had his visa been approved, would you still be in the picture?Take a moment to assess the relationship objectively. Actions speak louder than words, and his behavior signals a lack of future prospects. Consider these factors carefully before deciding whether to continue or end the relationship.Best regards, [MY LOVE LIFE AND I]
  • Someone asked:
    I need settled down. A God fearing and working lady in support of the home if needs be
    • mylovelifeandi replied:
      This is not the format to ask for relationship or friendship in the Anonymous here.You must narrate little things you are interested in, kind of lady/guy you want, age range and some descriptions and little about yourself and what you do, don't mention your name please because it's anonymous.For Example:I'm interested in meeting someone who shares similar interests and values. I enjoy outdoor activities, reading, and trying out new cuisines. I’m looking for someone who is kind, enjoys good conversations, and has a positive outlook on life. Ideally, you’re in the age range of 25-35.A little about myself: I work in [your profession], and in my free time, I like to [mention hobbies or interests]. I'm passionate about [something you're passionate about], and I love spending weekends [describe how you spend your weekends].If you think we might click, you can reach me at [your phone number] or [your email]. Looking forward to connecting with you.That is all. If you can't do that, do not bother sending request thank you.Thank you.