10 Pieces of Advice That Will help You If Your Partner Is Too Busy
One of the facts we have been able to gathered together in our few years of our counseling experience, is that: majority of the peoples in relationship nowadays do not seems to have enough time to spend with their partners most especially when they are still not yet married and some young couples struggling to cater for their families by all means.
The truth is that everyone is trying to struggle to become something in life, that is: we are all striving hard to achieve one particular thing in our work or career. Most times the little time we have to struggle to achieve something in life is common to be our youthful age. 18-45 at most. At the same time in our lives we are also looking out or maybe we have settle down with our life partners. The real truth is, majority do not dedicate their full time to relationship alone, probably many were busy fighting for one goal or another. Trying to manage their little time between their chosen careers and their families. Well, most times our partners may not know when we are busy fighting those battles alone, if we are not transparent about them.
It’s a very bad idea to start believing that if you partner is telling you that, “I’m busy” it might mean that he/she is probably cheating on you or not committed to the relationship.
You don’t have to conclude very fast until you have provide answers to the following questions:
- Is your partner always busy like that all the times without creating a time for you?
- Do your partner start the relationship with you that way?
- What type of job is your partner doing, hope it’s not the type that is consuming all his/her time?
- Have you caught your partner cheating on you before?
- Do you trust the relationship despite?
- Does your partner give you time when free from work?
- Are you begging for attention when your partner is not at work?
- Do you see any sign that your partner is giving attention to others than you are being given?
- Does it look like you are always forcing your partner to give you things you need?
- Does your partner fully support you despite having limited time to spend with you?
- Is your partner truly transparent about what is taking the time, and are you finding it difficult to believe what your partner is said concerning the matter? (Maybe your are always feeling he is not saying the truth)
- Is it difficult for you to understand your partner?
- Do your partner use to lie and not open to you?
- Is the communication always poor whenever you spoke with him/her in their free time?
There can be more questions that is not included here but if your partner is not guilty of any of these offences above, don’t conclude unless you have some proves.
What can you do to hold your relationship when your partner is always complaining of being too busy and you have find out if it’s true.
When your partner is too busy for you, it can be frustrating and even hurtful. However, it’s important to approach the situation with understanding and open communication. Here are some steps you can take:
1. Reflect on your feelings. Take some time to honestly evaluate how their busyness makes you feel. Are you feeling neglected, unimportant, or lonely? Don’t hesitate to let your partner know how you feel maybe there can be some adjustment if possible.
2. Communicate your needs. Talk to your partner about how their busyness is affecting you. Share your feelings calmly and use “I” statements to express the impact their schedule has on you. Avoid blame or accusations and instead focus on your emotions. A good Communication in the little time can also solve the problem.
3. Understand their perspective. Be a understanding partner who is not arrogant because of their own selfish interest. Explore the reasons for their busyness. It could be work-related, family obligations, or personal goals. Understand that they have priorities and responsibilities outside of the relationship.
4. Find compromises. Seek ways to find balance and compromise in the relationship. Discuss how both of you can make an effort to spend quality time together, even if it means a few hours a week or scheduling regular date nights.
5. Encourage independence. While it’s essential to spend time together, it’s also important to respect each other’s individuality and personal goals. Encourage your partner to pursue their interests while maintaining healthy boundaries.
6. Manage expectations. Adjust your expectations regarding the amount of time you’ll spend together. Consider discussing and setting realistic expectations that work for both of you given the individual circumstances.
7. Focus on self-care. Utilize the time when your partner is busy to invest in self-care activities. This can involve pursuing hobbies, focusing on personal growth, spending time with friends and family, or engaging in activities that bring you joy.
8. Seek support. If you find that your partner’s busyness consistently leaves you feeling neglected and unfulfilled, it may be helpful to seek support from a close friend, family member, or therapist who can provide guidance and an objective perspective.
9. Do other things that can make you happy. Play music, eat well, dances away your sorrow, do more of your hobbies, make sure you are always keeping yourself busy and not thinking. You can have a social media distance friends to keep your company, online gist partners but avoid strange attachment if you still want your relationship to work. You can also use text and chat to communicate with your partner when necessary if he/she is too busy to attend to you just drop a message for the person at times instead of call.
10. Withdraw your feelings and stop being desperate about the relationship. If your partner is not giving you time it can be a red flag. In such situations you need to minimize the way you are thinking and the attention you are giving to the relationship. You need to conclude that, “what will be, will.” If the situation will end the relationship, promise yourself to be fine with or without the relationship. Don’t be too desperate about making the relationship work at all costs. Put your mind together for anything that’s coming your way. Don’t get me wrong. I don’t say you should not love your partner anymore. Love, but don’t trust and love too much it can hurt you. In life, nobody is perfect. Your partner can disappoint likewise you at anytime, even when the time and everything you want is given to you 100% (husband percent). You need to know that having everything you want in a relationship doesn’t guarantee a smooth ending relationship. So always stay smart and wise up!
In conclusion: Remember, relationships require effort and communication from both parties to thrive. It’s important to find a balance that works for both partners while still supporting individual growth and responsibilities.
“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.
Stay safe and make others around you safe too.