Everyone in this life aim at choosing the best out of the best partner but most times the dream may not come true due to our numerous human wants and most times we are looking for a very perfect person which is absolutely impossible for human being because life is made up of so many beautiful imperfections, we are not meant to be perfect.
In this particular article we shall be taking a good look at some few things we should look out for when choosing our partners:
1. The Level of understanding.
It’s not everyone that can reason well or reason the way we sometimes reason, simply because we have different backgrounds, different levels of intelligence quotient (IQ), different levels of our exposures and lots more so due to all these we may not have same level of thinking but at least there must be a level of similarity between you and the person you will choose as your own life partner. Don’t choose anyone that will always have negative thoughts towards everything you say or do.
2. The Level of seriousness.
It’s not everyone that can be serious with their lives, some do everything they do with some level of I don’t care, they just do things without expecting any positive results. They are just doing it just for fun and with levity. The fact that someone is highly educated doesn’t mean that he/she is very serious or determined in life, some things are just coincident, fortunate or privileged to have those things they had, they do not really strive hard to achieve most things. In this life there are some people who wanted education but couldn’t afford it, it doesn’t mean he/she is not serious or nonchalant with life. Level of seriousness and determination should be seen in everything we do in this life, even our partner’s seriousness towards the marriage plans also matter. Being optimistic and not pessimistic always.
3. Acceptability and endurance.
Some may not want to accept you the way you are, don’t try to impress such person, don’t even go near him/her. Go for someone that truly cares about your own true feelings and not selfish with the love, someone who can’t endure with you when things is not alright. Don’t go for someone who always push you forward and not ready to take any risk for you, such person are too dangerous to go with on a life time journey.
4. The level of prayer, personal relationship and their believe ln God Almighty.
You are a Christian, your partner is a Muslim, you also love him/her so much but didn’t believe what you believe in. You may be serving the same almighty God but if you are not using same medium it will definitely affect your marriage and it may have strong impact on the children spiritual believes. If your own believe is a traditional believe, try go for someone who has equal believe with you, someone who can pray same way you can pray or even pray more than you can pray at times. If your believe is not the same, there will be some level of spiritual confusion in your home no matter how you try to perfect it. When the foundation is weak don’t expect the building to stay strong. Let your marriage and any other plans you have be build on God’s will.
5. The level of Maturity and how materialistic he/she is.
You don’t like jewelries but your partner cherish it so much to the point he/she can use all the savings to buy it, lots of jewelries and clothes in their wardrobe that are useless. You save up to achieve some things but he/she consumer who is consuming it, they don’t care to use all they have as their savings to buy some things to the point some are not useful for them again. Sometimes they can buy excess food just for a meal, home appliances and lots more in excess, and if he/she is not mature enough to handle matters, your home is in trouble. The way he/she talks to the family and friends also determine the level of their Maturity, you should look at that and don’t let love fool you.
6. The Level of showing appreciations for the things you do for him/her or those one’s that others do for him/her and the level of their giving out also matters.
Getting married to someone who is very stingy can be a big problem to your marriage and if care is not taken it can lead marriage to divorce. Go for a true giver, try to look for a real kind giver, go for someone who understand’s all your needs, all your worries, and even those things you don’t even need at times, someone who is a supportive partner, a good thinker and a great listener. Don’t marry someone that won’t support you financially, mentally, and spiritually.
7. Don’t choose a bully.
Someone who bully you for simple things that just need him/her expain to you or correct you gently with love for doing it wrong, someone who doesn’t care to beat, nag at you for simple mistakes you have made, someone who didn’t see you as a partner but a kid to him/her. Please try to go for someone who see’s you as a play mate and a suitable help meet, a true companion and best friend in the whole universe.
For some of us who are reading this piece right now, I knew some of us will have been saying why didn’t I even mention choosing a beautiful partner? Believe me beauty is not what to consider when choosing someone to marry because it will definitely deceive you to miss those real things you needed in building your home and the beauty you consider will later fade away with time. If you have finally find the one to marry, you will get to know that beauty is very useless when we talk of building a good home. Everyone is beautiful, it’s depending on the care and the way you choose to see him/her, One Man’s food can be another man’s poison.
For those of us who are reading this piece right now, I knew some of us will have been wondering why I didn’t even make mention of choosing a beautiful partner?
Believe me beauty is not one of those things to use to consider someone to date or marry because it will definitely deceive and fade away with time, it will make you miss those real things you needed in building your home and the beauty you consider will later fade away no matter how you tired to maintain it.
If you finally find the one to marry, you will get to know that beauty is very useless when we talk of building a good home. Everyone is beautiful in their own little ways, it’s just depending on the care and the ways you choose to see the beauty in him/her, One Man’s food can also be another man’s poison when it comes to beauty so always look for the inner beauty that will stay when the outside beauty disappeared.
8. Consider good character in anyone you will go for.
He/She might be the most beautiful/handsome, God fearing, hard working, focused and determined but if he/she lack’s good character and good manner of approach, he/she lack’s everything a good wife/husband material should have.
9. Consider All The Compatibilities.
- Educational compatibility
- Spiritual compatibility
- Communication compatibility
- Emotional compatibility
- Sexual compatibility
- Endurance compatibility
- Mental compatibility and lots more.
You need to be sure that you are compatible because every relationships, marriages, even friendships will later develop some issues at a time but because you and your partner is compatible, it will be very easy to figure out things but if not, it will be very difficult for the two of you to move on and the challenges you will face will be more, even you may not be able to resolve issues most times like others who are compatible.
Well you might later understand one another but lots of damages might have been done along the line.
10. If you are suspecting lack of respect, lack of loyalty and not being submissive to you please don’t consider such a person for marriage.
She can be the most beautiful on earth, if she doesn’t have respect and she is very proud, rude and not loyal to you your marriage is a hell. If she doesn’t want to be submissive to you as the husband and the head of the family, the home will always be on fire and there will be no peace, it will just look as if you marry someone who is a boss to you.
Also don’t choose who you want to marry because he/she has these following qualities:
1. Beauty.
Beauty will definitely fade away as times files, just choose people that truly loves and cares about you from their hearts and show it out, who also has most of the things I listed above.
2. Don’t let their level of education and exposure deceive you to marry them.
Education is only a qualification to secure a job, that doesn’t secure a good home for you. Go for people with the right understanding of what marriage and life is all about regardless of who he/she is in the area of education and exposure. Knowledge can be acquired at any point in time and at any age. education does not have a certain age, you can acquire it at anytime in your life if you are determined.
Beauty can be deceiving most times, appearance may not really shows our manners, so give patience to everyone that approach you or comes your way with love and care. Didn’t underrate anyone when it comes to love, let love and true feelings lead you right!
Thanks to you all for reading.